Redemption Song

Smilin' Reb Baruch unearthed this magical unplanned chassidic story jam from last year's freedom season. Some sort of grace came down that night.

A Strong Move to the Heart

And from here where do I begin?

I was feeling tired.
Quite tired in fact.
Come 6 o'clock on some days, and I'd be gone-but-gone - I had a certain motion of imagination where I would curl up on a shelf right about shoulder height and go to sleep. That's where my soul slept, and my body suffered through until it could find a place to shut on down - dead and away bone tired.

So I got the number for a helping-healer type who began with grace to guide me through how it was that I could once again listen to my body. Amid twists and turns, openings and awakenings, dispatched an early hint at the goings on. And after time it became clear a voice inside without a doubt whispering "what am I doing with my life"? And then the search was on (or shall we say continued - there were early rumblings that I had swept under the psychic carpet.) I had to find a new road, because the old one was walking all over me.

It hits me in davening. I could really make an exciting jump. Here I've been camped out in Bat Ayin for a few months, but in some way my hopes have been camped out here a good while longer, and I know now the place in a way intimate. I've been tuned in to its business side for a few years and know that there's an opening up near the top...

I popped the idea to the Rosh Yeshiva and he heard the same poetry I heard. We danced and negotiated, and wrote it up, and signed, I left I.B.M. (fare well old friends!) and came on to Bat Ayin - Executive Director of a place with wild potential.

I've been now a couple months in the saddle, new worlds, growing in management, marketing, discipline, dreams, vision, hope, writing, believing...

All in all - a strong move to the heart.

For years I was blocked at the neck, but now my heart sings in earnest...