Been spending my evenings crying.  Somehow the stoic disposition which I have spent years cultivating has not been the divestment of wild emotion that it was advertised to be, but really just a way of avoiding all of those things that were too messy to deal with.  Well, they've delt with me, in the form of a chronic exhaustion, and I have to put myself through remedial school in how to be human.  Mysterious tiredness upon examination reveals itself as a detachment of self from self, a running away.  
Away I'll run no more!  
Dragons beware!  
I'm on the march!
18 December 2006
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